"As-Salamu Alaikum, I'm a 17-year-old girl. I've always wanted to get married but never declared that fact to any member of my family because I know they will scold me since I'm still young. However, I like someone I met online because I used to recite Quran on the app called Discord. He liked my recitations a lot and wanted to get to know me more. We used to talk a lot about our faith. Over time, he expressed his wish to ask for my hand and introduced me to his sister as proof. However, he is from a different country, Pakistan, and according to his culture (which I read about in a book by a Pakistani writer), boys there do not have the right to discuss marriage with their parents until they can provide a household and be considered mature. He had a dream where he saw me entering Jannah and met him there, which means we will be together in Akhira, Insha'Allah. We are not in a relationship and have no intention to be. We both have boundaries in what we say and talk about, avoiding anything that couples do or talk about, and I am strict about this matter. He didn't see my face until last Eid because I am afraid of haram. We talk once a week just to check on each other. He is a first-year student in the College of Computer Science and said he would do his best to come and ask for my hand next year when he turns 18, Insha'Allah. I avoided getting attached to him and always used my mind when thinking about us. He has good qualities like patience, respect, and understanding, being the only boy among his siblings. His sister told me that he changed a lot after hearing me recite Quran and become serious about faith. He said he never heard such a beautiful recitation, and I guess this is because I'm Arabian. He also has good knowledge in different fields, is hardworking but sometimes loses passion. I've known him for 5 months now, but the more time passes, the more boundaries we set between us. However, neither of us knows how to tell our parents about us; each of them will likely refuse to let us engage. His parents due to culture, and my mom would never allow me to marry a foreigner, even if he is Muslim, because of my studies and because I met him online and talked to him, even though his only intention is marriage. My sisters knew their fiancés since high school, and one didn't get engaged until she was 26. My other sister is talking to two guys, and they might take months to get engaged. She will find any excuse to say no, while I have read a lot about his culture, so I am very careful and aware of everything. Can you please tell me what to do? How can I tell my parents? How can he tell his? Should we stop talking to each other until he can tell his parents? I am so lost; I asked Allah for an answer to my questions, and I know He will respond. But I really wish to know the solution, even information to help me know what to do, because we are not doing anything wrong, but at the same time, we both don't feel at ease…
Thank you for the answer. May Allah bless you and help you. Ameen.
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